Cure Ignorance!

So...here I was on vacation, enjoying the sun...the water...the relaxation...the rejuvenation, and #BOOM just like a bad nightmare, I was quickly thrust back into reality once I turned to CNN and heard of the vicious and brutal massacre that had occurred in NewTown, Connecticut.  Initially I was glued to the television---I was extremely saddened and I couldn't properly regulate my emotions!!After stepping away for a while I began watching again---until I realized I was becoming increasingly more angry at the news media.  Before they could even get the shooter's name correct (initially they named his Brother as the suspect), they had ALREADY diagnosed him with being mentally ill!  Then came additional speculations...he had a personality disorder-he suffered from Autism-he possibly had Asperger's. The more I watched...the angrier I got.  It seems as though every time tragedy strikes or violence is prevalent the perpetrator is ALWAYS labelled as mentally ill.  Fact of the matter is...research has repeatedly shown that the vast majority of people with mental illness are not violent...and the vast majority of people who are violent DO NOT suffer from mental illness. Stat of the year: People with mental illness only account for 4% of violence in America (New York Times).  So where's the disconnect??  Why is mental illness constantly demonized by those in the news media that continue to use their platform to spew ignorance?

This blog isn't intended to fight the stigma and shame surrounding mental illness...I've already blogged about that, and you can read it here ---->  Fighting Stigma and Shame! I'm actually writing this blog to BLAST ignorance...plain & simple.

It's ignorance like THIS...

I'd ban ALL guns for convicted criminals and ANYONE with ANY mental health history whatsoever.
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) December 14, 2012

If any member of a house hold has mental illness, that house hold can't own a gun! #easy
— Lee Miller (@mr_leemiller) December 18, 2012

Those defending violent video games miss my point: a mentally ill person, with easy access to guns, can have bloodlust fuelled by the games.
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) December 16, 2012

The solution to gun (all?)violence is to keep criminals & the mentally ill away from law-abiding citizens!
— An American Patriot (@Onelifetogive) December 18, 2012
 

Piers Morgan has 3 million followers and he chose to tweet ignorance? Seriously?

No really...do these people actually believe this stuff??  I have a mental illness (I don't suffer from it, I'm learning to thrive with it!!) and I am NOT violent.  I've legally own a gun.  More than one actually, and I'm able use them very well; I shoot better accuracy percentages than most of my police friends. BUT even at my lowest point in life (when I was not yet prescribed medication) it never even crossed my mind to use it on MYSELF, let alone others.  I'm a big kid at heart, so I have all the gaming systems---YES, I play "Call of Duty" regularly.  It's a shooting game.  I've played online against people, I've beat their socks off (they thought they had an automatic win playing against a woman)...but at the end of the day, I put my controller down, turn my system off---without even a mere thought of "bloodlust."  Maybe I'm a special breed---and somehow different from the rest of the people that I know that live with a mental illness, but I'm NOT.  I'm the standard...what the MEDIA portrays is NOT.  We're NOT all the same.   We're NOT all violent.  We're NOT all subhuman.  Believe it or not, EVIL people actually exist in the world. Evil does not = mentally ill!!! "Evil is about choice!  Sickness (Mental Illness) is about the absence of choice."  (Lindsay Fitzharris)

The ignorance of the news media fuels the stigma and shame of having a mental illness.  I'm NO LONGER ashamed.  Stigma and shame kept me from seeking help for years!  A personal crisis forced me to get the help I needed.  I'm no longer running away from or ignoring my problems, I'm facing them head on.  That's not the only thing I'm facing head on!! I'm also facing those that use their platform to spread lies and ignorance instead of educating themselves and the world!!  YES...a detailed and educational email response went out to Piers Morgan regarding his insensitive and ignorant tweet, NO...I didn't get a response, but I faced it head on!  Knowledge is the Cure for ignorance!! 

Beating the odds...Time for vacation!

You all know, these last six months have easily been the WORST six months of my entire life!!!  I've never experienced anything like the nightmare I've survived.  I lost MYSELF, betrayed my heart, and told lies to avoid losing the love of someone who didn't really love me like I thought they did.  I lost my dignity.  I lost friends and family.  I lost my MIND when a mental health crisis crashed my world!  TW:  Attempted suicide.  Battled an eating disorder. (End TW) Was diagnosed with depression and BPD.....ALL within six months.  I'm STILL here though...beating ALL odds that were set against me!

Recovery is HARD, but it's possible.  I've been putting in MAJOR work!!  Therapy session after therapy session.  DBT session after DBT session.  Al-anon meeting after Al-anon meeting.  Calls and meetings with my sponsor even when I didn't feel like it.  Keeping my appointments with my nutritionist and sticking to a plan EVEN when eating was the LAST thing on my mind.  Life Coaching sessions even when my LIFE felt hopeless.  Taking and tweaking medicine regimens even when the meds were making me sick.  Not to mention more inpatient stays than I ever care to remember...all in the name of trying to be the BEST ME I can be.

Have I stumbled?  Yes.  Have I sometimes regressed?  Yes.  Have I allowed people and things to make me spiral backwards?  Yep.  I'm STILL human.  I have feelings. I experience intense emotions.  YET. STILL. I. RISE.   Each time I bounce back quicker than the time before.  I have BPD, but BPD doesn't have ME!!!

Today, I'm leaving for a tropical vacation!!!!  After the whirlwind of the last six months, I DESERVE a vacation!!  Not a vacation from recovery, because I've learned to NEVER take a day off from making life better for myself.  I'm simply changing scenery.  This week I'll spend time working on "me" from a beach!  I have my reading material packed...and I'll read from the pool.  Guided Meditation downloaded....I'll find a quiet spot on the beach in the early or late morning hours.  I've scheduled to attend electronic Al-Anon sessions while I'm gone, and YES...my sponsor will be checking to make sure!  Meds are packed.  I'm ready!  I may not blog again this week, but I'll be sure to share some wonderful photo's with you when I return.

Nietzsche said..."That which does not kill us makes us stronger".  One of my twitter followers took it a step further and said that wound that you experienced wasn't a death sentence, but a LIFE sentence.  Embrace the healing and start living!!! So with that, I affirm today that I am ALREADY healed, happy, loving, wealthy, successful, confident, physically and emotionally well!!